killer plant attack

think about this, trees attacking human kind through a release of a freaky chemical that makes the humans go all suicidal on each other. however the cute little couple who realizes their undying love for each other survive the freaky muderous plant attack. pretty cool huh? NOT. Ladies and gentlemen, I think this right here is the reason why you should never allow a tree hugger to make a movie. seriously. why do we give crazy tree hugger people all of these millions of dollars to make movies about trees taking out their revenge on mankind? this right here is the effect of scientology. crazy hippie celebrities get behind a camera and kill all the happy people through PLANT POWER. That makes me think of "Captain planet, he's our hero, gonna take pollution down to zero".......honestly people if you want to freak out about taking care of good ole mother earth why not do what everyone did in the 9o's and make a crazy cartoon out of it? Look at our generation now....we're the instigators of the green movement that has taken the world by storm. GO GREEN OR GO HOME! That is a thanks to educational cartoons like captain planet who through the tails of superheros saving the world from greedy capitalists one oil spill at a time. NOT THROUGH MOVIES ABOUT KILLER PLANTS. That's just absurd. talking about it makes me giggle. then throw in mark whalberg and the hilarity increases exponentially. wow. people. fear the hippies. they make terrible movies.

debbie downer: take a prozac

Ladies and germs, I feel the need to share a beef of mine. I love all of my friends, with all of my heart. I truly, truly do. However what I have a hard time dealing with is people who choose to not make themselves happy. And on that note let me tell you the power of choice in your lives here blogging (much like jogging but w/o the silent j, and well a bl instead). Understanding that you choose the path in your life can be a powerful realization. One chooses what to eat, one chooses whom to love, one chooses to smile, and one also chooses to be ignorant to the choices that they make. People, here is something that really is not revolutionary but maybe a nice gentle reminder, you are the owner of your person. Take ownership of it and the fact that it is you who primarily can control your destiny. Do not fall victim to the lazy mentality that things are done to you, you set many of the wheels in motion for the events that happen in your life. Granted, I am empathetic to certain events completely left in the hands of a superior being, but for the most part it is YOU loves. If you want something different than what is your present, than take the power and change it. Scary yes, but by god I am sure that in the long run it will probably be better than dwelling on unsatisfaction. That's the great thing about life, is that even when you feel lost you can choose to find your way back. Many times with the help of those around you, because people are inherently beautiful. Or at least I think they are.

Realization number 2, life is not all that bad, and the world will probably not come to an end because of some irrelevant detail in your life, or because of choices you make. We are way too young to not understand this fact. Life is beautiful no matter how light or dark it is. We are so lucky to be in the thick of it. Many times, life is pretty hysterical. Why not find the humor in its awkwardness? Theme of tonight's post: You only live once, you might as well enjoy it.

Salute Your Dignity Goodbye

Hello Blogworld,

There is a familiar saying in my house called "PLD". For those of you who do not know, PLD is the most useful abbreviation in the english language. It stands for "Poor Life Decision". Plural, PLD's refers to the collaborative total number of moments in your life where you sit and think to yourself "What, the, fuck". My roomates and I have become spokes models for the phrase, and with pride I might add. Lately however, I have been rather dry of my PLD making abilities. Call it a dry spell, but my life had been lacking those moments that really 'wow' people. That is until last night.

Call it a lack of self control, I like to call it the curse of female stupidity. After a whirlwhind of a Thursday in preparations for the senior bar crawl that happens every year, it was time to board the bus, and put your game faces on for the night. Blackouts, well these were inevitable and well recieved among many. Inhibitions were aparently thrown to the wind. Some individuals known to myself even wandered quite inebriated to the neighboring suburbs, shoeless, broke, and cell phone less. Now that's a night out in my eyes. These kind of things can be chalked up to the ultimate PLD. No, no, my PLD was much more subtle, yet not less shocking.

Well after several rounds of delicious shots and some not so delicious ones mel petes was in rare form. Or rather a form that hasn't come out in a while. Needless to say conversations were had amongst myself and a 'blast from the past'. During these rather heated discussions there was a little man inside of my head having a field day because the irony of the situation would have made the writers of those very cheezy soap operas proud. I'm ready for my Oscar now thank you. For some reason this little man wrote words for me to say that were rather empowering. I laid it out to 'blast from the past' like no tomorrow. I was tired of being a rag doll in his twisted emotional soul searching. I had the power back, and I loved that. However after a few rambunctious rounds of making out, I knew that I had gotten myself into trouble, so I do what any self respecting girl would do in this situation of long lost whatever returning. I asked him to walk me home. The shock on my roomates faces as he walked in the door was priceless. Again, I put "The Young and the Restless" to shame. More talking, mixed with much more making out, led me to sending him home so I could go to bed. Well more so I could shove my face with the pepperoni goodness in my fridge. Successful night. I might say so.

Suprisingly, he held true to his promise today. Shocking. Could this be a turnaround? That little man inside my head is laughing at me. Feverishly. I choose to agree with the little man.

Well kids, trust me, I still have huge skeptisism. This would open a huge can of worms that I might like to stay closed. Go ahead, laugh. I am.

The Shakedown

Well folks let me tell you how thick the hipocricy is getting around here. I love people who talk a great game yet have no follow through. This seems to be more commonly attributed to anything male. Guys, sorry to say it but that extra X chromosome might do yah some good sometimes. The funny thing is, they tend to have expectations from me, yet they strike out everytime at the plate, or more importantly they rarely swing.

Basically I am saying this to all men, and to all the females out there as well. If you are going to do something, do it well, or do not do it at all. This yeilds true in work, school, and yes even play. It seems that the most arrogant and self involved have the strongest tendency to posess this fabulous talent I like to call the art of inflation. And that folks is where I come in, to deflate. It gets me in trouble, and often times leads to many dateless nights, but in all honesty I am ok with that.

Some may say I am a little blunt. Shocking yes, but I tend to say the things that others refuse to say. Granted college has tamed me quite a bit, however now that it is my last 'hurrah' so to speak at this fine institution, i'm becoming a little bit more overzealous. Again shocking, I know but please bear with me here. I promise this gets gooooood. I have no sympathy for people, because I feel most people are just way too darn whiney. Don't take on something you can't or don't want to handle. MAN UP so to speak, then don't cry when I call you out on it. Do your job, do it right, or get the hell out.

Basically life's new motto: Step up or Step out.

This has very practical application to all walks of life. Just say it three times, let it sink in, it's kind of like a drug. Feels real nice right?

Example number 2 for the evening (Sorry for the scatter brained ness, it's how I've been operating since i've stopped writing).

Again male stupidity. I absolutely love it. And I reflected on my very first and desperate post. From that time, I have been expected to be the BFF as well as get a whole boat load of walked on. Then there's the audacity to weakly admit a longing for my attention again, via text. Alright guys let me just throw this out there. If you are getting all sentimental with a girl even while you're so inebriated that you wouldn't be able to call Obama black, texting isn't necessarily the most touching. Maybe a drunken voicemail, that might suffice, but again i'm going to throw it out there when I say "Step up or Step out". I laughed, then went to sleep. Pathetic.

I don't really feel like writing anymore, I promise these things will get much better in due time. I tend to get more entertaining after a few of these. As of late, they're just a cyber space hiding spot for those dark and dirty secrets I don't have.